LETTER TO ALL YOUNG WOMEN OUT THERE.
I write this owing to what has turned out to be a big trap for most young women. A couple of weeks back, a number of ladies came out accusing Brian White for using and dumping them as one confessed to have been subjected to many abortions due to unwanted pregnancies. Then later alone, another lady came out accusing a renowned music producer Daddy Andre for sexually assaulting her. And the last nail on the coffin was when a one Brown Sugar appeared on various social media platforms accusing a one Sipapa for exploiting, abusing and destroying her future. These are just a snip burg of the so many cases some of which go unreported. Looking at these women, most of them are youths, a portion of the approximately 75% of the many that are battling with unemployment in Uganda. But taking a deeper look into these women’s lives, most of them were lured into these relationships thinking it will be bed of roses considering the fact that most of the accused whose hands these girls normally fall seem rich and wealthy.
Now here is the naked truth to all the young women out there, like my former lecturer at Makerere University always told us, ‘THERE IS NOTHING FOR FREE,’ There is no one on this planet earth that will allow you to just come and play a parasitic role in their lives unless you to are adding something to them. Your physical looks or your charm might ease your entry into a relationship or marriage but it will not get you sustainable there. Whether you have a rich or very hard working spouse, you too need to work. This tendency of only sitting and you watch your partner grow and develop himself and you just sit back and wait for whatever falls on your palms should stop! Your parent or guardians did not put you through school or any grooming to be someone’s parasite! Womanhood should not be defined and associated with beggary. What a man can do, a woman can do even better. That posh car, that house you are coveting and trading your destiny, dignity and life for can be attained by yourself and with your own hands if you work wise and hard. No one came out of her mother’s womb with any materialistic things. It’s all through hard sweat because nothing good comes on a liver plate.
Proverbs 31 clearly gives a bench mark or guidelines which one can follow to avoid excuses for their laziness. Verse 13 ‘she selects wool and flax, and works with eager hands’, this much tells how a woman of respect is not above littering her hands and has no illusions about what she does for a living. She knows that productivity and wealth begins with her hands not with her mouth. We should be women willing to work cheerfully with content. A virtuous woman is initiative and works on her own, she sees a need and rolls up her sleeves and attacks the project. She doesn’t only hope her husband will do it for her. Verse 15; ‘she gets up while it is still dark, she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls’, any woman who desires to be on top must be a go getter, an early riser, ambitious, diligent, she has less love for her bed. Verse 16; ‘She considers a field and buys it, out of her earnings, she plants a vine yard’,A virtuous woman uses the fruit of her hands to make an investment, out of the wise and care of the home and other financial matters.
‘A woman is the full circle, within her is the power to create, nurture and transform’, Diane Mariechild said. It baffles me seeing such power and potential be reduced to pauperism! Despite some loop holes in gender balance and access to equal opportunities, the ground is still so fertile for women to grow limitlessly. ‘I learned to always take on things I had never done before. Growth and comfort do not coexist’, Virginia Rometty. You cannot sit and expect things to be done magically. If you are a woman out there looking forward to a good and lavish life, then you must prepare your brain and be ready to litter your hands, acquire a technical skill, read a book or do any other activity that can add value to you. Much are the law is in existent to protect the women, it starts with self-responsibility.
‘What a Man can do, a woman can do even better!’
Carol Cartnel
CAROL NYANGOMA MUKISA
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